Curious what notable personalities in the scene think was great this year? So is TGEFM! So we reached out to some of our favorite luminaries ranging from musicians, label personnel, and more for their “Best of 2024” lists. Now, listen: TGEFM is not a taskmistress. Contributors can write these out however they want. So if it doesn’t actually look or read like a list… and sometimes it really is just a list with no other observations! Who cares?
Ray Hawthorne Sucks! No, not really, that’s just the name of the brilliant pop-punk record he released last month. Now he kind enough to share with TGEFM his favorites (I’ll let him tell you what type of favorites) of 2024.
When I was asked to do a “Best of 2024” list I knew there was only ONE option. I had to rate pictures of the best dog in the world, Oliver Hawthorne. So move over Moo-Deng, your cuteness has nothing on my dog.
Welcome… to Jurassic Pawrk. Cue the music, open the big gate, and gaze in awe. You probably thought all dinosaurs were big and scary, huh? Not true. Some dinosaurs are just annoyed that they’re forced to wear hats. Because of Oliver’s ability to be cloned from a million year old mosquito preserved in tree sap, I’m forced to rate this picture no less than a 10 out of 10.
Here we have a picture of Oliver celebrating his second birthday. His party was a very exclusive invite-only event held in April of 2024. Though only a lucky few were able to attend, we have this picture to show the rest of the world what they missed out on. Because of his quintessential puppy dog eyes, his “It’s My Bday Mother Puppers” banner, as well as his birthday hat, bowtie, and bandana, I’m forced to rate this picture no less than a 10 out of 10.
Believe it or not, this dog is sitting in an examination room at the vet. (Don’t worry he’s okay) Oliver LOVES going places, even if it’s the vet. And while he may be the most anxious dog in the world, a car ride and bag of treats really makes his day. Because of his smile, glaring optimism, and perseverance in the face of danger, I’m forced to rate this picture no less than a 10 out of 10.
Have you ever seen a more perfect set of teeth? Or a better side-eye? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Legend has it, Oliver was the original inspiration for the side-eye emoji. Apple is constantly hitting me up going “Ray please take more pictures of Oliver, we need to steal your information and illegally use pictures of your dog as a reference for new and exciting emojis”. 🙄😒 Then I just leave them on read, and take more pictures of Oliver anyway. Because of his perfect chompers, and timeless expressions, I’m forced to rate this picture no less than a 10 out of 10.
HEROES IN A HALF SHELL, OLIVER POWER! Little known fact about Oliver, he is one of the world’s most persistent Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles collectors. He’s always like “Dad, there’s new exclusive Ninja Turtles figures at Target, take me now before all the scalpers buy them to resell on eBay”. Or “Dad, did you know there are three different variations of the original 4 1988 Ninja Turtles figures? Why do we only have one?”. Then I have to respond like “Because the soft-head-fan-club variant is considered to be the true original” Then he goes “I’m a fucking dog, stop talking to me as if I know more than 5 words”. Because of his reluctant willingness to dress up in any costume I desire, I’m forced to rate this picture no less than a 10 out of 10.
This is Oliver trying to help some asshole sell copies of his vinyl on rayhawthornesucks.com. Because there’s some douchebag in an Elmo costume trying to steal the spotlight from Oliver, I’m forced to rate this picture less than a 1 out of 10.
Bad Dad (occasionally called Ed) has been on the periphery of the punk and punk-adjacent scene for over twenty years. While many contributors to this site have musical experience and talent, Ed’s musical claim to fame comes from his time in arguably the most punk rock Blockbuster Video district in NJ where he worked alongside members of Blanks 77, Best Hit TV and Brian Fallon. He is more than just an awful father to his 2 daughters, he is also a dreadful husband, a subpar writer, a terrible dresser and has a severe deficiency in all things talent… but hey, at least he’s self-aware, amirite?
Check out the pathetic attempts at photography on his insta at https://www.instagram.com/bad_dad_photography/
