Revisiting and Ranking Descendents’ 8 Albums

The Descendents are one of the most influential pop punk bands of all time. While they’re certainly not the first to play pop punk, it was their ability to etch out a very specific style and niche for themselves that helped them stand out from contemporaries. The lyrical style certainly stood out — serious, heartfelt lines sandwiched between joke songs full of childish humour. Even more influential than their lyrics were what each member brought to the music: the vocals, the bass guitar, the drums and even the lead guitar were all slightly individualistic and further helped the band to dig their own path.

The band formed in Manhattan Beach, California in 1977 by guitarist Frank Navetta and singer/guitarist David Nolte, with drummer Bill Stevenson and bassist Tony Lombaro rounding out the band in 78. The band struggled at first which led Nolte to joining The Last and Milo Aukerman to step onboard on vocals in 1980. These four then formed the “classic” lineup which went on to record the band’s debut and most popular album.

Due to Milo’s academic requirements, he left shortly after the release of the debut and Ray Cooper replaced him on vocals while also providing guitar. This replacement didn’t work and the band went on hiatus for the entirety of 1984 until Milo returned. Cooper then took over all guitar duties from Navetta. The band released their followup album and Lombardo left shortly after with Doug Carrion replacing him. In 1986 Carrion was replaced with Karl Alvarez and Cooper with Stephen Egerton. This lineup of Aukerman, Stevenson, Alvarez and Egerton has remained the band’s lineup to this day, albeit with multiple hiatuses.

While Dr. Aukerman pursued a career in biochemistry, the rest of the band continued under the name ALL, but with different singers. For vocalists, they started off with Dave Smalley of DYS and Down By Law. Smalley was quickly replaced with Scott Reynolds and in 1993, Reynolds was replaced by Chad Price. The band was quite prolific in its time together, releasing 9 albums in 13 years, but haven’t released any new material since 2000.

Although Milo is arguably the band’s most recognizable member, I believe it’s Stevenson who is the real heart and soul of the band. He’s the longest continuous member and the glue that holds it all together. He’s also a major component in the punk scene due to his recording studio, Blasting Rooms, which has churned out tons of excellent albums throughout the years.

It’s the extremely distinguishable playing style of each member that has kept the band so important throughout the years — this style continues to make them rise up from the rest and make each new album a reason to celebrate.

Ranking these albums was extremely difficult because they have no bad albums or even mediocre albums. Because of this I had to pick out certain elements from each record that helps it to be placed above or below others. As always, I can completely understand a different ranking depending on what you like about the band, but I tried to make it as accurate as possible.


8. Enjoy! (1986)

Length: 35:42

Enjoy! like the rest of the Descendents’ 80s catalogue, is complicated to rank. It’s the 2nd release with Ray Cooper on guitar and the first (and only) album with Doug Carrion on bass. Enjoy! is at times extremely earnest, honest and energetic. You can hear the band’s brilliance in the timeless classics “Sour Grapes” and “Cheer” that simply drip with an unprecedented amount of melody for punk at that time, yet the album is also very disjointed. The fart joke humour of the title track, “Orgofart”, and “Orgo 51” didn’t age well at all (if they were ever funny), while other songs such as “Hürtin’ Crüe” and “Green” are almost entirely forgettable. There’s the ambitious “Days Are Blood”, clocking in at almost 8 minutes that seems to completely lose touch with the essence of what makes early Descendents great — short(ish), fast, and relatable songs. All in all, about half the album is great-to-good and the rest I would pass on.

Recommended Tracks: Sour Grapes, Cheer, & Get The Time

7. I Don’t Want To Grow Up (1985)

I Don't Want to Grow Up - Album by Descendents | Spotify
Length: 29:31

The band’s sophomore release was a near toss-up with Enjoy! at last place, but it came down to deciding on quantity over quality. Enjoy! has the better individual songs, but half the album is skippable. I Don’t Want To Grow Up on the other hand is mostly good to great tracks save the short songs “Rockstar” and “No FB” and the title track with its annoying na na na na na na (which I realize fits the theme). This was the first album with Ray Cooper and last with Tony Lombardo so the record bares a lot of similarities to their debut despite Cooper’s guitar playing not quite matching the melodic subtleties of Navetta. Most of the songs follow a similar fast, to-the-point formula (albeit with Lombardo and Stevenson’s signature playing styles giving each song a very unique sound), except “In Love This Way” with its cleaner guitar and 60s rock n’ roll drumbeat.

Recommended Tracks: Good Good Things, Can’t Go Back, & Silly Girl

6. All (1987) 

All - Album by Descendents | Spotify
Length: 37:55

If you prefer more variety on your records, All may be just be the Descendents record you’re looking for. New (and current) members Karl Alvarez and Stephen Egerton helped shift the band’s sound into a new and more experimental direction while still retaining most of what worked on the first 3 albums. Both musicians are extremely talented, but Egerton’s guitar playing in particular stands out compared to the band’s older tunes. Egerton integrates much more advanced styles and solos into the songs — sometimes adapting to the band’s classic style while other times adopting more hardcore and even acoustic elements. As opposed to the first 3 albums, there’s no skippable tracks, but rather a couple mediocre songs in “All-O-Gistics” and “Schizophrenia”. These low points are offset by band staples “Coolidge” and “Clean Sheets”, the latter in particular demonstrating the simplistic genius the band is able to create with the song’s heartfelt and pure take on infidelity.

Recommended Tracks: Clean Sheets, Coolidge, & Pep Talk

5. 9th & Walnut (2021)

9th & Walnut - Album by Descendents | Spotify
Length: 25:21

9th & Walnut is one of the stranger concepts for a “new record” that I’ve heard in awhile. The songs were written between 77–80 (before the band’s debut), and the music itself was recorded in 2002 and 2020 with the lineup consisting of two members who aren’t even officially in the band anymore (Navetta & Lombardo). Luckily for us all, the album works. Even if most of the songs were subpar, “Nightage” alone completely saves the album. It’s an absolute classic of a Descendents song — lyrically and musically 80s while simultaneously modern with Milo sounding as good as he ever has; it has already become one of my favourite songs by the band. As opposed to the band’s other albums, the songs are mostly written by one person (Navetta) with four from Lombardo (the highlights) and a couple by original singer/guitarist David Nolte. This more singular approach to songwriting makes the tracks blend into each other somewhat more than other albums, but with such a short runtime it’s not entirely noticeable. This is an album that should easily unite old and new fans while continuing to show why the Descendents are one of the greatest bands of all time. 

Recommended Tracks: Nightage, Tired of Being Tired, & Mohicans

4. Everything Sucks (1996)

Everything Sucks - Album by Descendents | Spotify
Length: 30:57

The band’s time together in ALL (sans Milo) is really apparent through the cohesiveness of Everything Sucks. Where their 80s albums were full extreme highs and then moderate lows, their 5th record never reaches a noticeable low point. The only unfortunate casualty of this is that the music isn’t as stylistically varied as before, yet the quality of the songs prevents the lack of variety from being overly noticeable. The songs are fast and subtlely intricate like only the Descendents know how to do. The subject matter within many of the songs show a noticeably more grown-up attitude without completely doing away with the band’s fun antics of the past — like in songs such as “Coffee Mug” and “Eunuch Boy”. The band is even able to tie the album into their previous material by collaborating with Lombardo, Navetta, and Chad Price. The only song I slightly have a problem with is fan favourite “I’m the One” as its lyrics come too close to the Nice Guy attitude for my taste.

Recommended Tracks: This Place, Caught, & Sick-O-Me

3. Milo Goes To College (1982)

Milo Goes to College - Album by Descendents | Spotify
Length: 22:39

Does a band’s most iconic and important album necessarily make it their best album? For the Descendents, I say no. Despite Milo Goes To College being a timeless classic that includes several of the band’s best songs, an album that has influenced countless bands and may very well have shaped the direction of punk music going forward — the band is just too talented and gifted to award their first output as the best and not appreciate how they’ve improved upon their sound throughout the years. When ranking these albums, it’s also important to note the length of this album, which is easily their shortest. Now, if every song on this album was flawless, the short runtime could be forgiven, but there’s songs like “Tony Age” and “M-16” which are pretty forgettable and of course “Parents” which is one of the few Descendents songs that I just don’t like at all; the song’s lyrics are whiney and cliche and features a bass line that is surprisingly annoying. Regardless of these few flaws, this is still a phenomenal record and every bit deserving of all the praise it has received.

Recommended Tracks: Suburban Home, Myage, & Bikeage

2. Cool To Be You (2004)

Cool To Be You - Album by Descendents | Spotify
Length: 36:32

Cool To Be You finds the band in a more mature and sombre state than previous albums. It’s a record that deals with the minutiae of daily life on a different level than other albums. No longer do the songs focus on adolescent strife, but rather deal with married life, having children and the passing of family members. Although the album is more introspective than previous ones, it doesn’t mean the band has lost their sense of humour. Songs like “Mass Nerder” and “Blast Off” show the band is still more than capable of taking things less than serious. The songwriting is much less divided than other albums with Milo writing half the songs and the rest split between Karl and Bill with no songs from Stephen. This lack of division seems to give the album more cohesion thematically which I personally appreciate it. The record is also notable for including one of their few political songs “‘Merican” as well as one of the most personal songs “One More Day”. You could argue the album lacks diversity, but with every song being of such high quality, it’s barely noticeable at all. 

Recommended Tracks: Mass Nerder, ‘Merican, & Blast Off

1. Hypercaffium Spazzinate (2016)

Hypercaffium Spazzinate (Deluxe Edition) - Album by Descendents | Spotify
Length: 31:01

It still amazes me, when listening to this record, that a band can be around for nearly 40 years, take a 12 year break between albums and release something so entirely energetic and fresh. First of all, Milo sounds better than he ever as — you can clearly hear the emotion and anger in every crisp lyric that comes through the audio. As opposed to some punk bands at this stage of their career, Milo never sounds like he even slightly phones in any part of his singing, instead always giving 110%. Musically, the entire album comes across as a clinic in professional musicianship. There’s not a lot of flashy playing, which wouldn’t be the band’s style, but rather every song is extremely tight with everything perfectly in its place yet never sounding polished. The lyrics cover a variety of topics — some very personal, while others are written humorously. What this album is able to achieve, that puts it into first place, is its ability to conjure up the feelings and excitement of their early albums while still showcasing their unmistakable growth of talent and experience. It’s a perfect album that seamlessly blends old and new.

Recommended Tracks: Victim of Me, Shameless Halo, & Spineless and Scarlet Red

Occasionally TGEFM will cross-host an entry from Nobody Asked My Opinion, a regular blog where “human person” David Lorbiecke ranks all of the currently-released albums by a given artist. There is already a huge back catalog of rankings, and more are on the way. Be sure to visit Nobody Asked My Opinion to see more of these great rankings/reviews.

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