Roll of the Dice: 6 questions with Blag Dahlia and Ralph Champagne

Blag Dahlia. You know his name. His notoriety. But did you know he has a softer side? (Maybe?) On 16 Sep 2022 Blag introduced us to Ralph Champagne, an alter ego that satisfies and itch that Blag himself just can’t scratch (for reasons that will soon be revealed in the interview). They both kindly submitted themselves to a round of Roll of the Dice. We rolled a SIX.


1) Ralph, be honest here: What do you think of this Blag guy? I mean, you’ve got this album of classic rock ‘n roll tinged with Americana and Blag comes in and tries to steal your sound.

While it may be true that Blag is the best looking man in show business, he’s been biting ‘s style for decades now! It all started when Blag needed a special haircut for the Grammys. Champagne was out on work release from San Quentin and offered his services. Since then, Dahlia continues to rock his Count Chocula hairdo and Ralph Champagne does the singing. There are rumors of marriage in the air, but for now they’re happy just living in sin.

2) At first blush Introducing Ralph Champagne seems to come across as pretty serious, until one gets to the lyrics of course. But the music itself is played fairly straight and true to the genre, not unlike The Vandals’ 1989 LP Slippery When Ill, which leaned heavily into country/western. What’s the inspiration for the album?

Blag had dozens of songs that didn’t fit the Dwarves style. Ralph Champagne had the pipes to pull off those songs, but it was producer Andy Carpenter that brought them together and made the magic happen. It all starts with songs, whether it’s a punk record or Americana, without good songs it’s just people shouting into microphones. 

3) Would we recognize any of the other musicians who contributed to the new album?

Oh yeah! Celebrity drummer and raisin enthusiast Josh Freese is on there, along with sobriety spokesman Tom Ayres on bass and guitar. There’s a also a slew of guest hotshots like Jesse Olema on fiddle, Doug Lacy keys, Jason Freese piano, Elmo Weber sound design, Drew Taubenfeld on pedal steel. The list goes on because we wanted to make a really well produced listenable genre hopping monstrosity!

4) Ralph, I’d like to speak to Blag for a second, if that’s OK? Blag, how’s it going? You’re, like, insanely busy. Aside from producing and touring and all that, what was the inspiration, or impetus, for Ralph Champagne?

Blag here, ready to answer your question honestly! At this point when I do a three way the women’s combined ages are still less than mine. I needed a musical identity I could get old and unattractive with, and Ralph Champagne seemed to be the solution. Hardcore punk like makes women cry, whereas this Ralph Champagne Americana stuff is like panty grease.

5) You’ve obviously got your fingers dabbling in multiple parts of the music industry, and get around quite a bit. What are some bands you’ve heard of along the way that TGEFM readers should be paying attention to?

I like the Service and Sik Sik Sicks for new bands, in fact the Dwarves did a duet with Madd from the Sicks for our new record, and it’s pretty fucking sick! The Dwarves will never die and when we walk through fresh snow we leave no footprints…

6) Aside from Ralph Champagne, what’ve you got going on under the hood of yours that we can look forward to? Do you think we’ll hear more from Ralph in the future, or is he a one-off project?

Ralph Champagne is here to stay! The record just came out and I’m ready for a follow up! Meanwhile, the mighty Dwarves have a double LP worth of cool music recorded and redy to mix for release next year! Hardcore punk for the sexually active! And don’t forget my new novel Highland Falls available through Rare Bird Lit. The fact is, we’re in the middle of a Blagstravaganza of epic proportions! So stay fabulous and get everything here- thedwarves.com!


Roll of the Dice is a short interview format with a variable amount of questions. A Pair of dice is rolled and the total, between 2 and 12, is the amount of questions we can ask. All questions are given to the interviewee(s) at once, and no follow-ups are allowed. The interview may be lightly edited for content and clarity.

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